Clawing and burning.

I would quite like to sort out find out what exactly is going on, this side of Christmas. What is the point in pro-longing an expected heartbreak?

Not that I will be that bitter about it. I just prefer not to be messed around or “played” for much longer. It’s a bit ridiculous.

I have a meet up arranged with someone else today anyway.

I do hate how several songs remind me of you. It makes my ears feel like they are burning.

Whenever I think about this kinda stuff about you, it makes me want to claw my eyes out. I don’t really know why, but that is always the feeling I get.

On Sunday, on the train home from you, I instantly felt the loneliness and upset I usually feel a day or two after I have seen you. That can’t be a good sign.

All these things make me completely muddled. Is this what dating is as a twenty year old? Is it normal? Am I completely over-reacting? Can I just not handle casual dating? If this is casual dating, I don’t think I want to experience it ever again.

No more eye-clawing or ears-burning thank you. I think I have reached the end of my tether.


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